So, I was going to write about my birthday, but nothing really happened and I'm pretty much rage blinded by the institution that is the Royal Mail system that I would much, much rather complain about that instead.
Okay, call me crazy, but I like to send post cards and little souvenirs to people. Of course, since I didn't have a job until last month, I haven't exactly had the funds to send anything. I sent out a round of postcards because they're super cheap, but other than that the souvenirs I've been collecting have been taking up space in my room. Since it's now the Christmas season, and I have a job, I finally decided to wrap up all these gifts and send them along to my family.
We draw names in my family, and this year I got my youngest brother, CD. I did a lot of online shopping for him, so for the most part his presents have already arrived. But, I wanted to send him some chocolate and candy from London, stuff he could eat since he recently got braces, and I found this hilarious book at Windsor Castle about proper gentlemen hygiene and fashion that I figured he would also find hilarious. You know, little stuff, a key chain since he just recently passed his road test, little stuff like that. Since I'm in another country I decided the 'only buy stuff for your person' rule no longer applied to me, and I also got gifts for the rest of my family. My other brother, T, lives in Alberta so I sent his stuff separately, but in the parcel with CD's stuff I also included some presents for my parents and grandmother. A picture of a lighthouse for my dad, a scarf with my mom's family tartan that I found in Wales. Chocolate for both of them. A cat calender for my grandmother who's obsessed with cats. A London hat for my father. Things I thought they might enjoy, things I had chosen carefully with the expectation that one day they would actually get to see them.
Unfortunately, as of right now, it looks like my family may never see their Christmas gifts. Thanks to the Royal Mail and its special brand of stupidity.
My saga starts on December 6th, when I finally finished wrapping all the gifts, taped up the parcel, and hauled it, my brother T's gifts, and a friend's birthday gift down to the local post office. I seriously don't understand the employees at this post office. I had been there about two weeks earlier sending off another birthday present, so I knew the [annoying] routine. Before they take my money and the parcel they always say, "It's going to be a lot of money." Like, I appreciate the warning, but what do they want me to do at that point? Turn around and walk out all, "Oh, okay, guess I'll teleport it there instead." How else is it going to get there? By the way, it only cost 25 pounds to send A's gift to Canada. I don't really consider that expensive considering I paid for air mail and it got there in a week.
Now, I'm sure you're all wondering how much that big box cost to send. It only weighed 4.5 kg, and it cost 73 pounds to send it using the express option [insurance, 3 day delivery, but if it had arrived in 3 days you wouldn't be reading this rant, and the ability to track it]. You're probably gasping and in the throes of a heart attack at the price, but I really don't think it was that bad. There was, admittedly, a lot of stuff. AND, it cost 25 pounds each to send the other three parcels [T's Christmas gifts and the birthday presents for my birthday twins]. These gifts each weighed 1/9th the amount of the big parcel, they didn't have a tracking option, and they were going to take a week to get to Canada. Sooo, the big parcel was actually cheaper when you factor in insurance, weight, travel time, and the tracking bit.
Would I do it again? Probably not, even before Royal Mail lost the parcel. But it was Christmas, so I'm not going to complain [about that, anyway].
Since the parcel left on Monday, I figured it would probably arrive on Friday. Yeah, I was being generous and giving them four days. I started to track the parcel on Wednesday because I'm paranoid and I was worried the parcel would get stuck in customs.
On Wednesday, and on Thursday, the tracking information did not change. It has said, and still says at the time of writing, that the package is 'advised'. What, exactly, does that mean? Unsure, I took to Google, where everyone had a different theory. It could mean that it's stuck in customs, maybe that customs is going to charge my family to have the parcel released. Which is a separate rant, why would you make my family pay for gifts I sent them? It clearly says GIFTS on the custom's declaration. You don't make people pay for gifts. Unless you're customs, I guess. Other people thought it meant that parcel was in a cargo hold somewhere over the ocean, which, it better not be. I seriously worry if the people flying the planes are taking a week to cross the ocean. That takes a serious commitment to being lost. Sure, it could be in a ship somewhere in the Atlantic, but again, it better not be. I paid for air mail!
Deciding that the only way to know for sure would be to go directly to the source, I e-mailed ParcelForce. You can seriously only contact them through e-mail, otherwise I totally would have called since it's way harder to ignore persistent ringing than it is an e-mail. Anyway, they sent back a stock e-mail claiming they'd reply to me within two business days. This was on Thursday.
On Friday, I admit, I got a little impatient. I sent another e-mail where I asked after the parcel's location, and questioned why the tracking information hadn't been updated, and why it was taking longer than three business days for my parcel to get to Canada.
I felt a little bad afterwards because it was a very clipped message and, not rude, but I made it clear that I was annoyed. Then my mother told me that on her end, Canada Post had informed her that parcels are taking longer to get in and out of Canada thanks to some sort of mail bomb or whatever threat. So, then I felt worse because maybe it wasn't Royal Mail's fault!
Annnndddd then ParcelForce responded to my enquiries on Monday [my birthday!]. I won't post the entire e-mail here because it was ridiculously long and I can sum it up in about four lines, max. Basically, they're incredibly sorry that my parcel didn't make it in the promised three days, they understand how annoyed and frustrated I am that it hasn't arrived, but Royal Mail hasn't actually given them my parcel for delivery yet, so they don't know where it is and therefore can't update the tracking information or tell me when it will get to Canada
...
Wait, what?
They don't know where it is.
Honestly, my brain about exploded at that point. HOW DO YOU LOSE A PARCEL THAT BIG? IT IS THE SIZE OF MY TORSO. It's not like it's a postcard and can get slipped in with someone else's mail, or fall out of the bag unnoticed. It's 4.5 kg!
I sent ParcelForce a reply, and I pride myself on being polite. A new maturity that comes with being 23 I guess. I basically asked for clarification on the not knowing where the parcel is bit, and asked for the contact information of someone who can find the thing. So, Royal Mail's contact information, in other words .Because the tracking device on their site takes you back to ParcelForce. Yesterday, I found the Royal Mail tracking information by accident and promptly bookmarked it because I wasn't sure if I could find it again.
Not that it's useful, since it says the same thing as ParcelForce. Advised. Canada Post claims it was mailed in the country of origin, so at least I know it's not still at the post office being used as a foot rest. That's something, I guess.
ParcelForce sent back another stock e-mail, promising to get to my reply within two business days, so I went back to Royal Mail's website and started to look harder for their contact information. However, they've totally taken website design tips from the government because it is impossible to navigate. Eventually, thanks to my amazing ability to navigate stupid, and the sort of blind determination that comes with being angry, I found their customer service page.
And that, my friends and readers, is where my story ends. But why does it end on a cliffhanger, Jade? You might be asking. Because, my friends and readers, every, single time I click their 'Contact Us' link I get the following:
At the moment I'm stuck in an endless loop, and have been since yesterday. They link me back to customer services, I click the contact us link, and then that stupid little message with its sarcastic "Sorry..." [I've looked at it for so long it's taken on a tone, HELP ME!] mocks me and sends me back to the customer service page.
And there you go. The story up until now of Jade verses Royal Mail. Obviously I'll let you know the conclusion.
I should note at this point that the other two times I used Royal Mail they came through for me. Not one of the six post cards I sent got lost. Even though the first birthday gift was supposed to get there in 5 days, it arrived after 7, which I consider reasonable. I'll let you all know about T's Christmas gift and the other birthday gift...
<3 Jade
Okay, call me crazy, but I like to send post cards and little souvenirs to people. Of course, since I didn't have a job until last month, I haven't exactly had the funds to send anything. I sent out a round of postcards because they're super cheap, but other than that the souvenirs I've been collecting have been taking up space in my room. Since it's now the Christmas season, and I have a job, I finally decided to wrap up all these gifts and send them along to my family.
We draw names in my family, and this year I got my youngest brother, CD. I did a lot of online shopping for him, so for the most part his presents have already arrived. But, I wanted to send him some chocolate and candy from London, stuff he could eat since he recently got braces, and I found this hilarious book at Windsor Castle about proper gentlemen hygiene and fashion that I figured he would also find hilarious. You know, little stuff, a key chain since he just recently passed his road test, little stuff like that. Since I'm in another country I decided the 'only buy stuff for your person' rule no longer applied to me, and I also got gifts for the rest of my family. My other brother, T, lives in Alberta so I sent his stuff separately, but in the parcel with CD's stuff I also included some presents for my parents and grandmother. A picture of a lighthouse for my dad, a scarf with my mom's family tartan that I found in Wales. Chocolate for both of them. A cat calender for my grandmother who's obsessed with cats. A London hat for my father. Things I thought they might enjoy, things I had chosen carefully with the expectation that one day they would actually get to see them.
 |
| The parcel in question. I like to think its size means that it takes a special kind of idiot to lose it... |
Unfortunately, as of right now, it looks like my family may never see their Christmas gifts. Thanks to the Royal Mail and its special brand of stupidity.
My saga starts on December 6th, when I finally finished wrapping all the gifts, taped up the parcel, and hauled it, my brother T's gifts, and a friend's birthday gift down to the local post office. I seriously don't understand the employees at this post office. I had been there about two weeks earlier sending off another birthday present, so I knew the [annoying] routine. Before they take my money and the parcel they always say, "It's going to be a lot of money." Like, I appreciate the warning, but what do they want me to do at that point? Turn around and walk out all, "Oh, okay, guess I'll teleport it there instead." How else is it going to get there? By the way, it only cost 25 pounds to send A's gift to Canada. I don't really consider that expensive considering I paid for air mail and it got there in a week.
Now, I'm sure you're all wondering how much that big box cost to send. It only weighed 4.5 kg, and it cost 73 pounds to send it using the express option [insurance, 3 day delivery, but if it had arrived in 3 days you wouldn't be reading this rant, and the ability to track it]. You're probably gasping and in the throes of a heart attack at the price, but I really don't think it was that bad. There was, admittedly, a lot of stuff. AND, it cost 25 pounds each to send the other three parcels [T's Christmas gifts and the birthday presents for my birthday twins]. These gifts each weighed 1/9th the amount of the big parcel, they didn't have a tracking option, and they were going to take a week to get to Canada. Sooo, the big parcel was actually cheaper when you factor in insurance, weight, travel time, and the tracking bit.
Would I do it again? Probably not, even before Royal Mail lost the parcel. But it was Christmas, so I'm not going to complain [about that, anyway].
Since the parcel left on Monday, I figured it would probably arrive on Friday. Yeah, I was being generous and giving them four days. I started to track the parcel on Wednesday because I'm paranoid and I was worried the parcel would get stuck in customs.
On Wednesday, and on Thursday, the tracking information did not change. It has said, and still says at the time of writing, that the package is 'advised'. What, exactly, does that mean? Unsure, I took to Google, where everyone had a different theory. It could mean that it's stuck in customs, maybe that customs is going to charge my family to have the parcel released. Which is a separate rant, why would you make my family pay for gifts I sent them? It clearly says GIFTS on the custom's declaration. You don't make people pay for gifts. Unless you're customs, I guess. Other people thought it meant that parcel was in a cargo hold somewhere over the ocean, which, it better not be. I seriously worry if the people flying the planes are taking a week to cross the ocean. That takes a serious commitment to being lost. Sure, it could be in a ship somewhere in the Atlantic, but again, it better not be. I paid for air mail!
Deciding that the only way to know for sure would be to go directly to the source, I e-mailed ParcelForce. You can seriously only contact them through e-mail, otherwise I totally would have called since it's way harder to ignore persistent ringing than it is an e-mail. Anyway, they sent back a stock e-mail claiming they'd reply to me within two business days. This was on Thursday.
On Friday, I admit, I got a little impatient. I sent another e-mail where I asked after the parcel's location, and questioned why the tracking information hadn't been updated, and why it was taking longer than three business days for my parcel to get to Canada.
I felt a little bad afterwards because it was a very clipped message and, not rude, but I made it clear that I was annoyed. Then my mother told me that on her end, Canada Post had informed her that parcels are taking longer to get in and out of Canada thanks to some sort of mail bomb or whatever threat. So, then I felt worse because maybe it wasn't Royal Mail's fault!
Annnndddd then ParcelForce responded to my enquiries on Monday [my birthday!]. I won't post the entire e-mail here because it was ridiculously long and I can sum it up in about four lines, max. Basically, they're incredibly sorry that my parcel didn't make it in the promised three days, they understand how annoyed and frustrated I am that it hasn't arrived, but Royal Mail hasn't actually given them my parcel for delivery yet, so they don't know where it is and therefore can't update the tracking information or tell me when it will get to Canada
...
Wait, what?
They don't know where it is.
Honestly, my brain about exploded at that point. HOW DO YOU LOSE A PARCEL THAT BIG? IT IS THE SIZE OF MY TORSO. It's not like it's a postcard and can get slipped in with someone else's mail, or fall out of the bag unnoticed. It's 4.5 kg!
I sent ParcelForce a reply, and I pride myself on being polite. A new maturity that comes with being 23 I guess. I basically asked for clarification on the not knowing where the parcel is bit, and asked for the contact information of someone who can find the thing. So, Royal Mail's contact information, in other words .Because the tracking device on their site takes you back to ParcelForce. Yesterday, I found the Royal Mail tracking information by accident and promptly bookmarked it because I wasn't sure if I could find it again.
Not that it's useful, since it says the same thing as ParcelForce. Advised. Canada Post claims it was mailed in the country of origin, so at least I know it's not still at the post office being used as a foot rest. That's something, I guess.
ParcelForce sent back another stock e-mail, promising to get to my reply within two business days, so I went back to Royal Mail's website and started to look harder for their contact information. However, they've totally taken website design tips from the government because it is impossible to navigate. Eventually, thanks to my amazing ability to navigate stupid, and the sort of blind determination that comes with being angry, I found their customer service page.
And that, my friends and readers, is where my story ends. But why does it end on a cliffhanger, Jade? You might be asking. Because, my friends and readers, every, single time I click their 'Contact Us' link I get the following:
 | |
| Why yes, it does make me irrationally angry. Thanks for asking. |
At the moment I'm stuck in an endless loop, and have been since yesterday. They link me back to customer services, I click the contact us link, and then that stupid little message with its sarcastic "Sorry..." [I've looked at it for so long it's taken on a tone, HELP ME!] mocks me and sends me back to the customer service page.
And there you go. The story up until now of Jade verses Royal Mail. Obviously I'll let you know the conclusion.
I should note at this point that the other two times I used Royal Mail they came through for me. Not one of the six post cards I sent got lost. Even though the first birthday gift was supposed to get there in 5 days, it arrived after 7, which I consider reasonable. I'll let you all know about T's Christmas gift and the other birthday gift...
<3 Jade
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